Suicide

Although it is wrong to take one's own life, a person who commits suicide may not be responsible for his or her acts. Only God can judge such a matter. Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has said:

“Obviously, we do not know the full circumstances surrounding every suicide. Only the Lord knows all the details, and he it is who will judge our actions here on earth. When he does judge us, I feel he will take all things into consideration: our genetic and chemical makeup, our mental state, our intellectual capacity, the teachings we have received, the traditions of our fathers, our health, and so forth” (“Suicide: Some Things We Know, and Some We Do Not,” Ensign, Oct. 1987, 8).

To learn more: Hope and Help - Suicide

Understanding How Chronic Illness Affects Relationships

Chronic illnesses can begin at any time in life from childhood to old age. Some of these illnesses contribute to disabilities that are clearly seen, but others create “invisible” disabilities that may not be readily apparent. Family members and others who assist those with chronic illness also experience difficult challenges.

Chronic illnesses vary in their symptoms, treatment, and course. Some may be life threatening, and as they progress, the quality of life and ability to function deteriorate. Others, although persistent, may be less disabling and respond well to treatment.

Examples of common chronic illnesses may include such varied illnesses as cerebral palsy, asthma, multiple sclerosis, epilepsy, cancer, diabetes, heart disease, and chronic fatigue syndrome.

Living with a chronic illness involves more than the physical limitations created by the illness. It may also contribute to financial, relationship, and emotional challenges as well. Individuals may experience loneliness, embarrassment, fear, and concerns about dependency. It often takes time to adjust and to accept the realities of a long-term disabling illness.

Family life may be vastly altered if the primary wage earner is unable to work or if treatment requires long-term changes in the family routine and activities. Learning how to follow medical instructions, managing medication, working out financial challenges, and adapting to limitations and changes created by the illness all require learning new skills and ways of coping.

Those who cope successfully usually have a supportive network of people who help them to maintain a sense of dignity and self-worth. They also strive to keep the Spirit with them, remain close to the Lord, and keep the commandments.

To learn more: Hope and Help - Understanding Chronic Illness

Families with Disabilities

Having a child with unique needs can be the beginning of a journey that leads to great spiritual blessings. Learning how to raise a child with a disability is a process, not an event. You may struggle at times with painful emotions as you try to understand the disability of your child and your role as a parent. Having a child with unique needs, however, can be the beginning of a journey that leads to great spiritual blessings. Draw close to Heavenly Father and allow His Spirit to comfort and instruct you. Trust that God will make you equal to the challenge and will bless you with insight and understanding in making decisions regarding the welfare of your child.

To learn more: Hope and Help - Families with Disabilities

30 Things You Never Knew About Your Mom

Think you know everything there is to know about your mom? Try answering these questions on your own. Then sit down and ask your mom the ones you don’t know. You could be surprised at how much you can learn! It could even be a family home evening activity! Pick some questions from the list, and have everyone write down what they think the answer is. Then have your mom answer the questions and see who gets the most correct!

1. What was it like being pregnant with (or adopting) me? How was it different from my siblings
2. What were you like as a child?
3. What makes you happier: someone doing the dishes or someone giving you flowers?
4. Tell me about your worst date ever.
5. How many jobs have you had in your life? What did you learn from them?
6. Who was your favorite person to spend time with when you were a teenager? Why?
7. What kind of car did you learn to drive in? Who taught you?
8. What was the most popular song when you were in high school? What kind of music did you like to listen to?
9. Who was your role model as a kid? Who is it today?
10. What was the highlight of high school for you?
11. What are your favorite smells, sights, sounds, and feelings?
12. Is there anything in your childhood you wish you could have changed? Why?
13. What do you admire most about your parents?
14. Did you have any traditions with your friends growing up? What about fun family traditions for the holidays?
15. What is the greatest service someone has ever done for you?
16. Tell me about your worst hair day ever. And what about your worst hairstyle ever?
17. What is your first memory of Dad? What kind of boyfriend was he?
18. As a teen, did you ever feel the Spirit prompt you very strongly to do something?
19. What was your favorite restaurant or store as a kid?
20. What’s the best thing Dad has ever done for you? That you’ve done for him?
21. What’s your dream job? Is it different from the job you dreamed about as a kid?
22. Tell me about the first movie you remember going to. How much did a ticket cost?
23. Which three foods do you wish didn’t exist, and which three foods do you wish you could eat every day?
24. What was your first experience living outside of the home you grew up in?
25. What would you want your grandkids to remember you for?
26. Tell me about one day or event that you wish I could relive with you.
27. What’s your favorite thing about having kids? What’s the hardest part? The most surprising?
28. Do you have a favorite travel memory?
29. What do you feel like you inherited from your mom and dad?
30. What is your proudest moment as a mother?

To learn more: 30 Things You Never Knew About Your Mom

Families are a Source of Support

"Our families have the potential to provide a tremendous source of love and support. One reason the Lord has provided us with families is to listen and be available when it feels like there is no one else. Trusted family members may provide the validation and support we need to continue to face our challenges with determination." Addiction and Recovery Support Guide

Good Relationships Require Forgiveness

Forgiveness includes a process of letting go of burdens that keep us from experiencing the Savior’s peace. President Gordon B. Hinckley said, “A spirit of forgiveness and an attitude of love and compassion toward those who may have wronged us is of the very essence of the gospel of Jesus Christ” (“Of You It Is Required to Forgive,” Ensign, June 1991, 2). We will find healing as we forgive others. President James E. Faust taught: “It will take humility to do this, but if we will get on our knees and ask Heavenly Father for a feeling of forgiveness, He will help us. The Lord requires us ‘to forgive all men’ [D&C 64:10] for our own good because ‘hatred [hinders] spiritual growth’ [Orson F. Whitney, Gospel Themes (1914), 144]. Only as we rid ourselves of hatred and bitterness can the Lord put comfort into our hearts” (“The Healing Power of Forgiveness,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2007, 69).

Forgiveness does not mean that we condone our loved ones’ poor choices or allow them to mistreat us. Forgiveness allows us to move forward spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Just as our loved ones are in bondage to addiction, our unwillingness to forgive can hold us captive. As we forgive, we leave behind feelings that, in the words of President Thomas S. Monson, have the power to “canker, fester, and ultimately destroy” (“Hidden Wedges,” Ensign, May 2002, 20). In this way, we eliminate the barriers to having the Spirit more abundantly and continue on the path of discipleship. As President Dieter F. Uchtdorf reminds us, “Heaven is filled with those who have this in common: They are forgiven. And they forgive” (“The Merciful Obtain Mercy,” Ensign or Liahona, May 2012, 77).

To learn more: Addiction and Recovery Support Guide

God is Aware of Our Situation

There may be times when we wonder if God knows what we are going through as our loved ones struggle with their addictions. As we turn our hearts and minds to God, we can sense His presence and guidance. Elder Kevin W. Pearson of the Seventy said, “He loves each of us perfectly and is full of mercy and understanding. He knows everything about us. He knows what we need, even when we can see only what we want. He has infinite power and capacity to sustain and guide us. He is always willing to forgive us and to help us in all things” (“Improving Your Personal Prayers,” Ensign or Liahona, June 2013, 36–37). President Thomas S. Monson taught, “Again, my brothers and sisters, our Heavenly Father is aware of our needs and will help us as we call upon Him for assistance. I believe that no concern of ours is too small or insignificant. The Lord is in the details of our lives” (“Consider the Blessings,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2012, 88).

To learn more: Addiction and Recovery Support Guide

Strengthening Marriage

President Ezra Taft Benson taught: “Marriage . . . is the most glorious and most exalting principle of the gospel of Jesus Christ. No ordinance is of more importance and none more sacred and more necessary to the eternal joy of man. Faithfulness to the marriage covenant brings the fullest joy here and glorious rewards hereafter.”

There is a course and a workbook developed to help spouses develop and maintain an enriching relationship with each other. The course covers six topics: “Applying Gospel Principles,” “Communicating with Love,” “Fostering Equality and Unity,” “Overcoming Anger,” “Resolving Conflict,” “and Enriching Marriage.”

To learn more: Strengthening Marriage

Arming Children Against Pornography

As you teach your children about intimacy, keep in mind the following principles that enhance learning:

1. Share the responsibility to teach with your spouse.
2. Teach your children by example.
3. Be consistent in your behavior.
4. Counsel with your children.
5. Pass righteous judgment on your children.
6. Provide a positive emotional climate in your home.
7. Hold family home evenings regularly.
8. Share your thoughts and feelings with your children.
9. Break the routine.
10. Express your love to your children regularly and frequently.

To learn more: A Parents Guide
A guide to help parents teach their children how to follow the Lord’s plan and understand the sacred nature of intimacy.

Hope and Help - new section on LDS.org

This is a new section on LDS.org. Some pages may be enhanced and additional topics added based on your feedback.

Life brings many challenges for every member of the human family. Some challenges are the result of unwise choices that all of us make from time to time. Others may have nothing to do with our choices at all but are the results of others’ actions. And sometimes, like a bereavement or a chronic illness, there is no one at fault. But in every circumstance, hope and peace can be found in the gospel of Jesus Christ and in the infinite Atonement of Christ, who understands our burdens.

Please prayerfully use these topic pages whenever you feel burdened, to gain hope or help for your needs, or to support those you care about. The topics are listed in alphabetical order.

• Abuse
• Addiction
• Adoption
• Death, Grieving and Loss
• Disabilities
• Divorce
• Emotional and Mental Health
• Forgiveness
• Overcoming Pornography
• Pregnant and Single
• Same-Sex Attraction
• Single-Parent Families
• Suicide
• Unemployment

To learn more: Hope and Help

Family Home Evening - You Can Do It!

A father gets home tired after a long day at work and finds the rest of his family struggling with similar grumpy feelings. It’s Monday night, and holding family home evening seems impossible. After saying a prayer for help, the father and mother decide to keep things simple. They call their family together, sing a hymn, and pray together. They give each member a small candle to light as they tell about something that inspired them recently. In a darkened room, the light of the candles represents inspiration and focuses the children’s attention. As testimonies are shared, a feeling of sweet peace and love enters the home. The family ends the night grateful they held home evening.

Did you know that family home evening has been a Church program for 100 years? In April 1915, the First Presidency directed members to set aside one night each week for family prayer, music, gospel learning, stories, and activities. (See “100 Years of Family Home Evening” for an excerpt from the First Presidency letter.) Prophets continue to remind us of the importance of family home evening. “We cannot afford to neglect this heaven-inspired program,” President Thomas S. Monson said. “It can bring spiritual growth to each member of the family, helping him or her to withstand temptations which are everywhere.”1

Here are some attitudes to keep in mind as you make family home evening part of your week:

This applies to me. “Family home evenings are for everyone,” said Elder L. Tom Perry of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. All of us—married or single, with children or without—can dedicate time to strengthening family and learning the gospel.

I can find time. The Church sets the example by keeping Monday nights free from Church activities. You can show the Lord and your family that you are willing to set aside time for what is most important.

I can find what works for my family. If your family is separated geographically, try a “family online evening” to talk with family members online or over the phone. Does someone have to work late? Hold a “family park evening” near the workplace during a break. A divorced father held a “family letter evening” each Monday, writing to his children who lived far away. Let obstacles be a catalyst for greater creativity.

I can start this week. Family home evening can be organized according to the needs and circumstances of your home. Here are some general suggestions:

• Start and end with prayer.
• Use music, including hymns and Primary songs.
• Learn from the scriptures and modern prophets.
• Include a variety of physical activities, service projects, and gospel-centered activities from week to week.
• Have fun! Play a game or make refreshments.
• Be consistent. If you can’t do it on Monday, find another day that works.
I want the blessings. Prophets have promised that if we participate in family home evening, great blessings will result: Love and obedience at home will increase. Faith will develop in the hearts of youth. Families “will gain power to combat the evil influences and temptations” that surround them.

While your family home evenings may not be perfect experiences every time, your family will be strengthened and blessed by your efforts. “Each family home evening is a brushstroke on the canvas of our souls,” Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught. “No one event may appear to be very impressive or memorable. But just as the … strokes of paint complement each other and produce an impressive masterpiece, so our consistency in doing seemingly small things can lead to significant spiritual results.”

Give Highest Priority “We counsel parents and children to give highest priority to family prayer, family home evening, gospel study and instruction, and wholesome family activities. However worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely-appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform.”

First Presidency letter, Feb. 11, 1999.

To learn more: Family Home Evening - You Can Do It!

Elder L. Tom Perry on the Family